Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. [whistling] Im on break. This conversation got so goddamn out of hand. Copyright Fandango. Streaming Schedule, Season 5, Part 2 Debut Info, 2023 NYP Holdings, Inc. All rights reserved, Stream It Or Skip It: 'John Mulaney: Baby J' On Netflix, The Stand-Up Comedian's Post-Rehab Return To Center Stage, Stream It Or Skip It: 'Alex Borstein: Corsets & Clown Suits' On Prime Video, Mrs. Maisel's Manager Takes The Stage To Sing And Sling Jokes, Stream It Or Skip It: 'Louis C.K. In a dystopian future devastated by air pollution, the survival of humanity depends on the Black Knights and theyre far from your average deliverymen. Probably a big glass of tea with a big slice of lemon. I know theyre perfectly content to live the way they do. Starring: Ron White Watch all you want. And he said that the Golden Corrals the best place to find these people cause he says thats where the really big girls like to winter. Sean L. McCarthy Decider. She goes, Listen, Ron. Put down that ketchup and drop that toddler. See how much funner it is to say? Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up Well, I got stationed at Pearl Harbor. We go back to OLearys Pub where this whole fucking thing started. I ordered the movie. Sean L. McCarthy works the comedy beat for his own digital newspaper,The Comics Comic; before that, for actual newspapers. Where Was 'John Mulaney: Baby J' on Netflix Filmed? Watch trailers & learn more. I can I got to get this right for the special. Geese arent natural. Theres an opening act that makes between 100 and 200 a week for nine shows, the feature act, which is what I was, makes between 400 and 500 bucks a week for nine shows, and a headliner who can make absolutely anything depending on who they are. And it really reminded Jeff and I of how much fun we have on stage together and how much we like to play off each other. Now, I dont know whats wrong with your vagina that makes you think it needs to be rejuvenated. Remove Ads Cast Crew Details Genres Cast Ron White 63 mins More at IMDb TMDb Sign in to log, rate or review Share Ratings 1 fan 3.3 We would sit around, drink, and and talk about maybe one day, you know? And You Might Be A Redneck had been the number one-selling comedy album in the country for a year and a half. Terms and Policies You think you know tender but you really dont. Ron, wake up. She was trash drunk on red wine. That guy cant drive my fucking car. [inaudible] I want to start off this evening by telling you something about me you may not know. Sure, Larry the Cable Guy is the definitive character act in the group headed by Jeff Foxworthy with Bill Engvall. Follow officers from a South Carolina sheriffs department as they urgently search for individuals who've disappeared under troubling circumstances. And I am an idea man, too. Besides, if youre at that point in a make-out session, youre gonna do it anyway. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up subtitles. Or any. I never got over it. Okay, heres mine: Just lunch, and a blowjob. Members can watch as much as they want, anytime, anywhere, on any internet-connected screen. What's he doing? And if youre looking for a bicycle, its a great deal. *****************************************************************************Donate belowYour contributions help support the channel!https://www.paypal.com/donate/?token=376E-66mSO9HVNOKHNfR6XaKkMJJ11H_3hh8b15mFOUQcpHHDeBUDuuMYQwlvkjM9gARI0\u0026country.x=CA\u0026locale.x=******************************************************************************Needing Assistance to Create/Host your Website, check out blue host below:https://www.bluehost.com/track/phlavaFind the Perfect freelance services for your business eg) logo design and branding, dropshipping, illustrations, clothing design, business cards, t-shirt designhttps://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrcpaFor Fiverr Logo Design:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2Flogo-design-7%2FFor Fiverr Social Media Design:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2Fsocial-media-grid-design-2%2FFor Fiverr Animated intro Video:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2F%3Fs%3DAnimated%2BIntro%2Bvideo Cause I dont care if shes a little salty. All right, yall shut up. You know why? Ron Tater Salad White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. And, uh this is a story my mother told me I should do on stage. Ron White- If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up (2018) Watch HD. His jokes are cynical, full of satire and sarcasm and that's what makes it good. Im not, and Ill tell you why. Two years ago, White co-starred in Cameron Crowes one-and-done season of Roadies for Showtime. Youre still going to hop in that motherfucker. Thats why. Cause I dont have the answer to a lot of lifes questions. Its just the words they say, whatever the fuck they say just cracks me the fuck up. Now, when I have seven eighths of a gram of marijuana, I consider myself to be out of marijuana. Get a dress the size of a fucking barn and come on back to the Golden Corral. [mooing] They call it Golden Corral, of course, because somebody was already using the name Ye Olde Fat Fuckery. Let me show you some skills. Just confirm how you got your ticket. Im like, No! You cant fix stupid. It follows Bert Kreischer as he spills on bodily emissions, being bullied by his kids and the end to his familys escape room outing. Whats the problem? I said, I ordered a movie, it said, Please enjoy your feature film, but nothing came on the TV. She goes, What did you order? Cast Away. It seemed like they would give you a sack or something. I gotta go. Im coming back twice a day every fucking day. Ooh! [Ron White] You ever take a crap so big your pants fit better? After Id been there for a little while, I found out there was one part of Hotel Street on Oahu that you go to, and these really cute girls that jump in your car and blow you for five dollars. Fuck that. But on the way, they must confront what it means to be different. I started this tour a while back in Las Vegas, and while I was there, I was walking down the Strip, my wife and I, and theyre having a sex toy convention, which is one of their five biggest conventions of the year. You were right! If You Quit Listening Ill Shut Up opens with soundbites from Whites previous specials, then we see him onstage, in a crisp suit, revealing to his fans how fame and fortune has changed him. And I double snotted my own fucking television. ", Stream It Or Skip It: 'Moonage Daydream' on HBO Max, a David Bowie Biography That's More Sensual Experience than Documentary, Personality Crisis: One Night Only Finds Punk Pioneer David Johansen Recounting His Many Lives, Stream It Or Skip It: 'The Legacy of J Dilla' on FX/Hulu, Exploring The Life, Beats, And Career Of The Late Hip-Hop Hero, Stream It Or Skip It: Little Richard: I Am Everything on VOD, A Biodoc As Vibrant As Its Subject, The Peter Pan & Wendy Sea Shanty Is An Ear Worm That Will Haunt Your Dreams, Stream It Or Skip It: 'Peter Pan and Wendy' on Disney+, Director David Lowery's Lightly Visionary Disney Rehash, Where Was Peter Pan and Wendy Filmed? We decided to break it up, and Vegas will make you horny if you let it. In the wake of her prom scandal, Princess Margrethe longs for normalcy as she struggles to maintain her perfect facade while dealing with family drama. And he comes up to me and goes [high-pitched] Mr. And if youre all politically correct, dont worry. But it sure helps to have a headliner believe in you like Foxworthy believed in White. Ron White - You can`t fix stupid - video Dailymotion And these guys are laughing and dancing and drinking, and theyre having a fucking blast. Drunk driving. And I was like, Goddamn, Ray! He said, Well, shes had three kids. Im like, What, for lunch? Just laying there dead, cause it died somewhere? After dedicating years of service at a matchmaking company, Arini tries to piece together her mysterious past and memories of a former client. No. Traditionally in American comedy clubs, theres three acts. And traditionally in American comedy clubs, theres three acts. Thats why. And I think thats why they marry so many of them. It was a demo when I bought it, had 350 yards already on it, but I put the other 400 yards on it myself. I dont have another eight goddamn dollars. And I called the front desk in a panic. While I was in Canada shooting a fucking pilot! So unhappy, theyre willing to bleach it until it becomes a more desirable color. And I dont know why, cause they used to sell duck tacos, nobody gave a shit. Thats something we dreamed about and it fucking happened. Im like, What do I even do? 41,150, This story has been shared 20,592 times. 2021 Scraps from the Loft. I just never have. This happened last Wednesday at The Comedy Store in LA. Hes the drunk uncle of the group. Joe Rogan with Ron White on Dane Cook, Carlos Mencia & Stealing Jokes From Comedians! Its baby duck pussy lip taco night, and get there early, because, uh, parking. I got to go this year for the first time in my career to do stand-up in Europe, and I did shows in Amsterdam, Edinburgh, Scotland, and London. Sign in to rate and Watchlist for personalized recommendations. Go behind the scenes of Netflix TV shows and movies, see what's coming soon and watch bonus videos on, Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up (Teaser), Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up (Trailer). Cinemark Im better at oral sex than Ive ever been and I think its just because Im older and Im just more patient than I was when I was young, because cause now Ill lay there for hours and let you do your thing. I said, Let me go talk to her, so I go up to the room. You know, the fame and fortune and all that? And I said, I dont think so, but I kept thinking about it, and I realized its changed me in two ways. Fuck, dude. I was doing a meet and greet the other day right after a show, this young guy goes, When my girlfriend comes back from vacation with her parents, Im going to ask her to marry me. Ron White - Take 2 Viagra and demand a pat down. What they do is they take these baby ducks, and they just snip the pussy lips off of em, and it takes, like, 35 baby ducks to make one taco, but it is fucking worth it, man. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up - Netflix How much is the personal massager shaped like a big black cock? But she was well within my budget. CatherineBridget86886758. 13,103, This story has been shared 7,786 times. A chaotic intervention. You know, they do that now. Id help you move it out, but Im bleeding. From the big lip to the little lip, right over the clit, tuck in the meat curtains if you got em. Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. 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Watch Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up | Netflix Official I just grabbed my big black dick and left. I dont remember. The shit that should have never got said got said, it just spun into this big shit storm of fuck. Stream It Or Skip It: 'White House Plumbers' On HBO, A Comedic Take On The Bumbling Team Behind The Watergate Break-In, Stream It Or Skip It: Kiss, Kiss! on Netflix, a Polish Rom-Com With an Oogy Womanizer Protagonist. The same week we were at the MGM Grand, they were at Caesars Palace, and that same weekend, Larry The Cable Guy was at the International House of Pancakes in Tucson, Arizona. Charming. What kind of balls does it take to put the word corral on the name of your fucking restaurant? Boy, do they know that demographic! Not the good frozen pizza, the other fucking frozen fucking pizza, and go back to the shitty little motel they rent us, and one night a week, Id let myself rent a porno movie, and Id call this date night. I dont know if you know. Well, Ive been here, but Ive never been here, and if I only Dead. In a dystopian future devastated by air pollution, the survival of humanity depends on the Black Knights and theyre far from your average deliverymen. [Ron White] You ever take a crap so big your pants fit better? Baby goose pussy lips makes wagyu beef taste like boot leather. No, no, White proudly proclaims on his fifth stand-up comedy special, and first for Netflix, that at 61, hes a raging alcoholic.. What? And he had bunk beds in his room, and Joe Paines on the top bed, Danny Davis is on the lower bed, and Im on a sleeping bag on the floor, and I wet the fucking bed, and Im, like, mortified. Cause were looking for a gag gift, and if that doesnt gag her, I dont know what were going to use, cause its gotta be something big, you tell me. I got like 20 tweets from one guy, going, My wifes pussy was burning like No, you didnt. Do you have any advice, Mr. White? Now, Id just got off the ugliest phone call Ive ever had with my wife, and it was about that house, and part of that house was gonna be a rehearsal space for her band, and while I was shooting a pilot in Vancouver, it turned into a 24-track recording studio. 6:01, gets there. Ahh! Young Queen Charlotte's marriage to King George of England sparks an epic love story and transforms high society in this "Bridgerton" universe prequel. You got to quit eating them babies, maam. Ill get some money. And word of that spreads throughout the criminal community. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up Radical terrorist Canadian geese! Nothing could make this better. Moxy and her colorful friends leave Uglyville on a quest to find a kid to love. He wants to build a wall between the US and Mexico to keep out immigrants, and I wanted to build a net between the US and Canada to keep those fucking geese out of here. I got attacked by a goose when I was a kid. Im ready. Im not, and its not fair to me, because Im older, Im not in that great of shape. My friend told me the other day that he wouldnt give his wife head unless she just came out of the shower, and I told him Ill give my wife head if she just came out of the gym. I do. No, this has to fucking happen. [audience whooping] Looked like somebody had stretched a Looked like somebody had stretched a rubber band over a gigantic head of cauliflower. Im on the back porch of the church, eating my little sandwich, six years old, drinking my Kool-Aid. I need to get her a gag gift. Starring: Ron White Watch all you want. How about a sobriety contest? RT25: Celebrating 25 years of Rotten Tomatoes. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up 2018 | Maturity Rating: TV-MA | 1h 3m | Comedies Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. Recorded at The Paramount Theater in Denver, CO, stand-up comedienne Kathleen Madigan explores topics including aging parents, interactions with millennials, and hunting bigfoot. Watch Ron White: If You Quit Listening Ill Shut Up on Netflix, This story has been shared 41,150 times. No other fucking animal does this. They all look like fucking tents. Here's When It Returns With New Episodes, Drew Barrymore Halts Segment After "Severely Old" Mac and Cheese Noodle Flies off Her Desk: "It's Rock Hard". Required fields are marked *. You go anywhere in West Hollywood, theres these gigantic gay mens clubs with these huge patios. I didnt make the drinks. Eat this baby goose pussy lip taco., Back in 1996, my dear friend Jeff Foxworthy became the biggest comedian that ever lived. It's Me, Margaret. Itll be fun. Im like, All right, lets go. And it was unbelievable, huge, all the big dildo companies were there, uh. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up 2018 | Maturity Rating: 18+ | 1h 3m | Stand-Up Comedy Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. So when Bill gets finished, he comes down and does a set with us and when we get done with our shows, Bill and Jeff wanna go drinking and gambling, and I want to go to a prayer meeting and a poetry reading that Id heard about. Im a joke writer from America. 7,786, This story has been shared 5,838 times. Geese started flying through the engines of that jet. I really do. our special coverage of the white house correspondents dinner starts right now neck . And it turns out I had no problem with it at all. and the Thats all you get. Not plump girls, not fat girls. And then I was watching Godfather, I thought, Well, if instead of that horse head, they just had Chris Hemsworth with no shirt on. What? Now I dont know if they have a color in mind when they start, or if you just bleach it and get whatever the fuck you get. Thanks a lot. Netflix Ron 'Tater Salad' White is bringing his classic story-telling style of standup special, 'If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up,' to Netflix this week, and he is surely going to get you laughing your guts off. Trying to make this funny, sell some comedy tickets in a land where you dont play my shit. One, while we were building this house, my wife selected these really exotic Japanese toilets. You're almost there! You ever seen a dead goose anywhere in your goddamn life?
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